David the City Boy

My buddy David was born here in the valley but after his mom moved down south to Los Angeles, David followed her down when he was about 14 because he couldn’t stand his stepmom and her kids. He ended up staying down there about 15 years before moving back up here to try to re-establish a relationship with his dad.
Shedding all those big city wasn’t easy for him at first. If there was freeway travel he added in an extra hour – it took me months to convince him that up here, you can actually drive the posted speed limit and that we hardly ever travel slower than 55 on the interstate. Our freeways did not turn into parking lots during ‘rush’ hour. It wasn’t easy convincing him of that either – the nearest freeway was a good 20 miles away.
And then there was the way he talked. I don’t know if he was quiet by nature or if he got tired of me fucking with him. I mean he was from Okie stock and was born here, but after all those years down there with the surfer dudes, when he tried to say ‘y’all’ it come out sounding like ‘yowl’. That was always good for a belly laugh.
But the best one by far was the time we were down in Maiposa County running the dirt roads, a nice spring day, and all of a sudden Dave goes “Whoa! Come back around and check this shit out!!!”
I slammed on the brakes, sliding around like I did that shit every day and idled back up to where Dave was jabbing his finger. “Check it out, man. A calico cow!”
I peeked in the brush and after I finally quit laughing I had to explain to him that us rural folks called cattle and bulldogs of that color combination ‘brindles’.

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3 Responses to David the City Boy

  1. Sara says:

    LOL!!!!!!!

  2. I remember spending all my summers at my aunt and uncles farm and Arkansas. When I got back to St. Loo for school all the kids gave me grief because my accent had shifted so bad. It took almost to the end of the school year to lose my “Country” accent and get a proper St. Louie” accent back. Just in time to head back to the Farm in Arkansas for the summer, where I got teased for my “City-boy” accent.

  3. kerrcarto says:

    I get pissed off when ten cars back up in my town.

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