Good ol’ Florida

CLEARWATER, Fla. (WFLA) – Police say a man caught masturbating at a Clearwater bus stop told them he was Captain Kirk.

Clearwater police were called to a bus stop on Gulf to Bay Boulevard around 11:20 a.m. Monday for a report of a lewd and lascivious act.

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10 Responses to Good ol’ Florida

  1. BigSlurpy says:

    I hope they reported him to Starfleet Command.

  2. Shitz says:

    At least he’ll have a nice cot in jail to wank on, and he won’t have to pay a bus fare

  3. Kenny the Scot says:

    So was it Captain Kirk?

    That’s a disturbing thought.

  4. Jack says:

    Captain Kirk? No, try Captain Jerk (see what I did there?)

  5. Cornholio says:

    Dammit Jim!!

  6. Al says:

    So did the cop collect evidence, and handle it correctly for trial?

  7. California southpaw says:

    If you’re Captain Kirk at least put up the shields so nobody can see you.

  8. otay! says:

    Hey, I was not, never at CLEARWATER, Fla.

  9. truthzzzz says:

    A female relative lives near there.
    Dumb ass criminal.

    The beautiful park near there had acres of trees cut down and a war memorial put in. They put in parking lots. They put in drains to prevent excessive pollution of the lake there. They tore out native grass and put in bahia grass (Saint Augustine Bahia I believe) that requires watering and fertilizer and care. More pollution for the lake.
    There used to be an eagle on the other side of the lake in the park, I was told. There are fewer wading birds like egrets and herons fishing. Aquatic grass and reeds are fewer now. The bums have set up residences in the park now.
    More jobs for maintenance. A grand LOOK AT ME by the poli5ticians who have accomplished SOMETHING they can point to. More people working so more taxes must be raised or more borrowing.
    result: A park dedicated as natural land is now reamed, screwed and paved over a more than ever should have been paved. more contracts to the right people. More employees needed. Bigger government kingdoms.

    People have no real advantage. City land used for political and enrichment purposes. Park degraded from a beautiful natural native vegetation park to “They Paved Paradise and Put Up a Parking Lot” status.

    So I suppose I did a little back story on the now excessively cleared and submitted to Scientology City of Clearwater.

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